Romney acceptance speech

If I were assigned the chore of writing Mr. Romney's acceptance speech at the upcoming convention, it might go a little something like this:
  My dear fellow Americans, I humbly accept the faith you have placed in me to be your candidate for President of the United States of America.
The daunting challenge we face is perhaps the most important in all our history. America is badly wounded, my friends. There have been fifty plus years of snowballing
 liberalism, interspersed with periods of nominal conservatism, during which the Left only paused to catch their fetid breath and plan for the next assault.
 That assault during the past four years has been nearly fatal to democracy. We are dead broke, and owe more money than a hundred generations could ever pay.
 The present sad administration has run up more debt than all 43 of its predecessors did in our 230+ year history. The President has simply bought up whole constituencies,
putting it all on our tab, for future generations to deal with.
The proverbial "can" has been kicked to smithereens, and lies broken and battered in the gutter. In my opinion, and in the opinion of people whose job it is to know these things,
there remains little time for repair.
  Let me say a few words about what brought us to this low ebb in our erstwhile glorious history: liberalism. Liberalism, sometimes referred to as Progressivism, and its evil sibling Socialism,
are the scourge of Western Civilization. Western Civilization, btw, is the acme of world civilizations, contrary to what most of us have been taught in the secular, revisionist, progressive,
socialist swamps our schools have become. Just about everything you see around you is a product of the greatest minds of Western Civ, as well as the greatest music, poetry, literature,
science, and the visual arts. This is not to brag unduly, or to discourage others, but it also should not be forgotten, or omitted, due to oppressive PC. But back to Liberalism.
  Are there extant pejorative words adequate to describe what the Left have done to America?  Rock and Roll began (ca. 1954) the task to despoil music in the West. Typical of liberalism, suddenly,
in music, you didn't have to think any longer, just feel the primitive rhythms. No one younger than 60 in America even knows what popular music before rock was like. You could Google "All The Things You
Are," to get an idea. People like Alan Ginsberg, Kerouac, and other incipient hippies had a go at finishing off literature and letters for the masses.
It would be easy to go on and on, but it suffices to ask you to take a look around you as you leave this, or any other room. Fat, slovenly, undressed even for a run to the out house people, tattooed slobs
who know all the execrable TV shows, but stumble like the bumpkins they have become if asked anything at all about American History, let alone world history.
  But the shortest proof of how far we've fallen is quickly shown when you take a look at the crooks, misanthropes, psychotics, intelligentsia (LOL!), and aspiring tyrants who have been elected to the highest offices in the land!
They didn't get there by themselves, you know. I don't know if there exists anywhere near the 50+% it will take to elect a real, live, thinking, accomplished, sober, bright, patriotic American such as myself and Rep. Ryan, but
if not, you might soon introduce yourselves to those chains with which the risible Joe Biden (What, me worry?) threatened the miserable throng in VA. (If they weren't miserable, would they have assembled to hear such a clown?)
God Bless!
(Harry F. Hagan, Atlanta)

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