TOTAL BULLSHIT!: Trump Goes Off On Mueller Report, People Who ‘Take So-Called Notes'

After a 22-month investigation — with 2,800 subpoenas, 500 witnesses and 500 search warrants, which generated thousands of pages of information, all costing upwards of $30 million — the media boiled it all down to two words: “I’m fucked.”

The media, toeing the line for Hillary Clinton — who, after her shocking and humiliating loss decided that she needed someone or something to blame and pointed a crooked finger at Russia — decided that President Trump all but admitted his alleged crimes with those two words.

In his report revealed on Thursday, Robert Mueller described a scene in the Oval Office that allegedly took place right after he was appointed special counsel and charged with investigating allegations that Trump or his campaign minions colluded with Russia to alter the outcome of the 2020 election.

Many media outlets did not include the context, which was plainly spoken by Trump at the same time. “Everyone tells me if you get one of these independent counsels it ruins your presidency,” Trump said. “It takes years and years and I won’t be able to do anything. This is the worst thing that ever happened to me.”

Luckily for America, he has been able to work through it all, returning the economy to its past glory, achieving record lows in unemployment, and much more.

Now, Trump is taking aim at “people that take so-called ‘notes.’ “

“Statements are made about me by certain people in the Crazy Mueller Report, in itself written by 18 Angry Democrat Trump Haters, which are fabricated & totally untrue. Watch out for people that take so-called ‘notes, when the notes never existed until needed. Because I never….” Trump wrote Friday morning on Twitter.

Trump got worked up after that, calling some tales told in the report “total bullshit.”

“[I]t was not necessary for me to respond to statements made in the ‘Report’ about me, some of which are total bullshit & only given to make the other person look good (or me to look bad). This was an Illegally Started Hoax that never should have happened,” he wrote.

Late Thursday night, Trump also praised Wall Street Journal opinion writer Kimberley Strassel, saying she “should get the Pulitzer. She is a treasure (and I don’t know her) who correctly called the Russia Hoax right from the start! Others who were soooo wrong will get the Prize. Fake News!”

In a tweet on Thursday, Strassel perfectly summed up the contents of the Mueller report.

“1) What is in the Mueller report: –endless, unrevealing details of inconsequential interaction between trump folks and Russians. –remarkable details about the many and varied statutes the SC [special counsel] nonetheless debated using to tie someone up for something on the Russia front,” she wrote.